Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
