I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
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Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
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Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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