Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
