I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Never joke about your clitoris.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
