oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
