One girl and one boy is just not enough.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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