Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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