What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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