I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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