I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass