oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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