yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
