broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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