a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
