For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
