Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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