I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I did not marry a roomba.
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