i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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