You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
