so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
