Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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