she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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