Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
