Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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