come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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