I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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