Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
