K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Farmville is her only friend.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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