I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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