I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Randomize
