You just made me feel so damn special
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
