I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
