Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
