it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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