Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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