I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
