Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+27): View more from South Africa

I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.

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(434): View more from Virginia

Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.

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(561): View more from Florida

i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls

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(212): View more from New York

You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(561): View more from Florida

hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now

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(218): View more from Minnesota

just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.

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(519): View more from Ontario

How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things

(1-519): View more from Ontario

I felt like I was at the zoo

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(702): View more from Nevada

I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.

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