Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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