so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
