i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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