she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Couch. On fire.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize