The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
