Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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