I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
