Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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