so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
