Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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