it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
