that's an acceptable place to lick
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
