During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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