My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
